It became clear, as the retreat progressed, that I was not quite made up of the same wood as some of the other retreatants. No jumping out of bed, at the sound of the wake up bell. A few times even, I lingered under the covers, past the 6 am time for our first sitting. In contrast, my roommate darted out every morning at 5.20 to ring the bell. She was also amongst those who lingered past the official 9.30 bed time, heeding the teacher's invitation to stay for further sitting 'if you want'. I never once heard her come in to sleep at night. Was she pulling all nighters? This was not about competing, but still . . . I could not help but wonder, how did she, and the others do it? So stoic, and still sitting perfectly straight, some standing even, during the last sitting. Whereas, I had to leave discreetly several times, out of sheer exhaustion. And if I stayed, I made sure to secure a spot on one of the few couches, so I could practice lying meditation, eyes wide open to not fall asleep.
This made me think of the many shades of Buddhists out there, from the hard core ones I met during the retreat, to the nightstand Buddhists referred to by Gil in one of his talks a few weeks ago. Where along that continuum do you fit?