Tuesday, January 11, 2011

This, Not This

Ruth Denison on Right Understanding.
It's been a while since I heard Ruth speak. Here she is, talking about right understanding:

The wisdom to know, 'this', 'not this' . . .

Often throughout a day, I come across such moments, when the road splits and I get to decide, this way, or that way. Private moments, private conversations, private decisions with consequences, big and small.

Some times, it's hard to know. The signposts are not clear about either destination, or there is not enough light. These are times to reflect, to listen to one's dreams, to gather more information. Standing still, waiting for the right time to act.

Other times, I find myself on automatic pilot, driving on a road I did not even know I was on. Needing to stop, to reevaluate the course. 

Or I want to see the whole map at once, and all there is is this small portion, this one decision that can be made. All others are to be put on hold . . . 

And then, there are those times, when the road is blocked. Obstacles inside or outside, or sometimes both prevent the possibilities of any further progress. One needs to have faith then, and trust in the inner process. I have had many such times in he darkness. In hindsight, these were the most transforming times in my life. Eventually, new roads opened up that were not visible at first.

What is your fork in the road presently? How do you decide, which road to take?


  1. I've just recently found your blog, and am ever so happy that I did. Here where I live there are no temples, no other practicing buddhists that get together and meet just to talk or anything and that really bothers me. So I go it alone ;)

    Currently my fork in the road is (I'm a single parent of 5) that I am struggling to make it, I suffer from chronic pain every day due to some of my diagnoses, I have just been offered a great job with wonderful benefits...I fear that I might not be able to complete all of the duties, but I REALLY need the money and it's in my field (bus mgt)...so I'm going to take it and try my best!!

    The other side of the fork that is calling me is that my Dad who lives in Arizona has wanted me and the kids to move there for years to get a new start. He would help us with the move and with getting on my feet at first. The problem there is that I don't get along with the new wife. When I say I don't get along with her I say it lightly, but I mean we REALLY DONT GET ALONG, it has gotten to the point that we don't speak at all, EVER!!! And I know this hurts my DAD. I almost want to go to Arizona and start over, and let my kids have that relationship with their grandfather, and I miss my Dad like crazy...but I don't know how it would work out with his wife!!

    Well, anyways...I really like the looks of your blog so far and can already tell that I will be back often.


  2. Ok, so now that I've taken the time to read this again much more slowly, and took notes :)

    Thanks so much for posting this!! I really, really needed to read this!!

    Very beautiful post, btw!!


  3. Thank you Steph. You certainly have your plate full!

    I could see how in your situation, it would make a lot of sense to join a virtual sangha. Have you looked into the IMC Online Community? Just a thought . . .


    Meanwhile, may this blog be a place or rest in the midst of it all.

    Much metta to you, and wishing you to make wise decisions, and to continue to find the inner strength for yourself and your family. :)