When Sleep Catches Awareness

A slight case of mid-afternoon sleepiness, gave me an opportunity to practice Mingyur Rinpoche's instructions for 'sleeping meditation'.

Boredom, sleepiness, dullness, drowsiness, etc can all become support for meditation. There is nothing to do other than being aware. Starting with normal sitting meditation posture, and then no longer worrying about it. Body can do whatever it needs to do. Rinpoche demonstrated and had his body almost drop to the floor. Eventually, letting sleeping catch awareness. With practice, all sleep can become awareness.

3 signs of sleeping meditation:

1. no dreams
2. when one wakes up, the awareness is right there
3. the body feels very restful afterwards

I did not fall asleep, but I did experience a different way of being with the sleepiness. Inclusive, vast. Amounting to nothing less than a profound change in the way I was able to rest in awareness, completely, without any holding back. 

Oh! the joy from embracing all that is . . . 

Sleepy and Awake

Sitting, by lanai, eyes closed, I feel breeze's soft caress on my face. I could have sat this morning, but lazy mind thought otherwise. Now is after lunch, and sleepiness threatens to take over. Sleepy, sleepy . . . I keep repeating, in between faint breaths. Awareness does not have usual sharp quality. Craving being more awake. Noticing craving. Thought, should I even bother? What's the point of sitting, and being sleepy? No, to be with what is, regardless. Sleepiness, and dullness, that's what I get today. And breath. Thought of earlier readings, about forest monks being asked to sit through sleepiness. Thought gives me courage to continue sitting, and clarity. Dullness, and clarity, co-existing. Breath. Sleepy. Thought of dried mangoes. Wondering when Whole Foods will call, so I can go pick up newly arrived batch. Craving. I am stomach. Breath. Sleepy . . . Bell rings.

Still Body, Deeper Practice

I made the mistake of sitting after lunch. Sleepy. I am feeling sleepy. Not liking having to sit up straight, and still. My body's rebelling with aches here and there. Under the tip of my right foot, in the neck, right shoulder. I refuse to give in. There is wisdom to be gained in not moving. Breath's helping, only a little. The un-indulged tiredness feels like Chinese torture. Thoughts come and go. With each, I escape moment, for a short while. I could latch on, and distract myself, some more. No, to stay present, with the torpor. Noticing I am not 100% there. My brain's doing some interpreting of the moment. Misrepresenting, lumping each sleepy second into one big stretch called "I'm so sleepy, and I want out". Leaving little room for finer attention, to the subtle changes. Outside noises, take turn to break into the rigidity. Each time, giving awareness a fresh start, a new chance to focus, and explore 'sleepy'. After a while, fresh energy starts flowing. Mind, no longer dull, can start working with breath again, and engage in satisfying work of concentration.

Although Vipassana practice makes room for slight shifts of the body during meditation, I find I am getting more out of sitting when I take on the stillness of Zen. In the discipline of motionless body, there is no escaping the moment.