Tuesday, January 5, 2010

Looking In the Mirror

Traveling to faraway places as I have during the last ten days, has been a wonderful opportunity to learn more about myself, mostly through careful observation of my reaction to others, outside of (relatively) predictable home environment. Desires, one after the other, came knocking during this trip.

Desire for the best Chinese food, and frustration when my company did not adhere to the same standards, although I almost always got MY way.

Desire for more shopping, unleashed by the many deals to be had, and the charm of visiting all the local markets. Wanting more things to call MINE, and continuing on with quest, way beyond 'to-buy' list. And not liking Prad's reluctance to oblige.

Desire to max out on touristic experiences. Taking in as many different, beautiful views as I could. Climb up and down Victoria  Peak, ferry ride to Kowloon, stroll through the stunning grounds of Chi-Lin Nunnery, discovery of hidden alleys in Central District . . . Annoyed at times, that we had to accommodate our friends' small children. How dare they put ripples in MY otherwise perfect experiences?

Desire for uninterrupted comfort. Readily going along with my friends' suggestion that "Here you just take cabs. Cabs are so cheap. No need to bother with public transportation." Tossing aside my environmentally conscious self, and pouting when Prad insisted that we take train to the airport instead of a cab. Suffering unpleasantness from holding on to MY view and intransigeant craving.

Hong Kong, and to a lesser extent Singapore, two beautiful cities, both acting as backdrops for hungry ego's playing out of its boundless demands. Loved ones holding mirror for me to see all of myself, warts and all. I am feeling so grateful for this most precious gift of truthful reflection.

Sitting in the plane taking me back to San Francisco, I have vision of hollow sphere, lined with rough surface made of prickly peaks and valleys. Inside roughness slowly dissolving with clear seeing.


  1. Strangely there is something quite soothing in your wonderful description of your practice. Maybe it's because there is such directness and clarity without blame. Lovely piece of writing. Such an honest description of what it's like on a moment to moment basis to live in this human skin.

  2. Oh! thank you for gift of your heartfelt appreciation. It means a lot. Yes, we are all made of same very imperfect human cloth . . . :)

    Deep bow.


  3. truly beautiful. I will be following your journey with interest.

  4. Thanks Valerie! So cool, you are a designer. Thoughtful design can be an enduring act of caring. I certainly experienced it that way during my trip to Asia, where everything seems to be designed with the user in mind, down to most minute details!