Cultivating the Land of Mind

From U Jotika, a very wise Theravada teacher, some pointers on how to prepare the mind for mindfulness practice:

Before we meditate there are few things we need to reflect on in order to prepare our mind. In our daily life we get dis- tracted by so many things . . .

'When we understand that life is short and time is precious and if we will have developed some understanding of the Dhamma, it becomes more precious. Do not procrastinate, do what should be done today, we don’t know whether we will be still alive tomorrow. Today, now, do what should be done, try to accomplish, to do.' . . . 

An earnest meditator doesn’t procrastinate. No matter where you are or what you are doing; that is the time and the place to meditate . . .

When we take Buddha as a teacher, His purity, wisdom and freedom gives us a direction, “Where am I going, what is my goal”? . . . 

When you’ve really seen that meditation is worthwhile you’ll give your life to it. The more you give, the more you get. Do it with all your heart! . . .

Freedom really means knowing what is useful, what is beneficial and worthwhile, knowing what is wholesome and what is unwholesome and choosing what is wholesome, good and right and doing it whole heartedly . . . 

When we don’t keep the five precepts we harm others as well as ourselves. These precepts are not imposed by somebody. It is nature . . .

Let go of the past and be willing to fully live in the present. Be willing to change and to grow. Often we are afraid to change, to grow, and because of lack of confidence we don’t try our best. We are responsible for ourselves and our lives, no matter what happened in the past, without blaming anybody . .  .

It is a natural thing for every being to experience good and bad things in life, reflecting on this it helps to let go, to not get attached . . . 

Meditation is like cultivating the land. Look very deep into your mind every day, and try to weed, because every day seeds are coming in the mind. They will take root and if you let them stay there long, their roots will become very strong and it will be harder for you to root them out, but if you can throw away the seed before it germinates it will be very helpful . . . 

It is up to me, up to you.

Now, may you enjoy this day, cultivating mindfulness.

Our Own Mother

Yesterday, after posting my short bit,  I realized I had left out one important factor in the filling of the glass: 

If we want a realistic relationship with ourselves that is conducive to growth, when we need to become our own mother. A sensible mother can distinguish between behavior that is useful for her child and that which is detrimental, but she does not stop loving the child when it misbehaves. This may be one of the most important aspects to consider in ourselves. Everyone, at one time or another, misbehaves in thought, speech, or action - most frequently in thought, fairly frequently in speech, and not so often in action. What do we do with that? What would a mother do? She would tell the child not to do it again, reassure the child of her continual love, and get on with the job of bringing up her child. Maybe we can start bringing up ourselves.

~ From Be an Island, by Ayya Khema ~ 

Staying with the filling the glass image, what happens when one is cut from the source, or when the water cannot flow freely, or when the water that flows is polluted with undesirable elements? What happens when we have not internalized the capacity to be a good mother to ourselves? What are we do do? Are we to keep on meditating, hoping that sustained mindfulness will bring to light our chronic self-hatred and dissolve it ultimately? Are we to pay a visit to a psychotherapist and get reparented? Or are we to do both?

So many folks have trouble forgiving themselves for their imperfections, and when they sit, the process of seeing their misdeeds up close, only reinforces their sense of badness. This is where contemporary meditation teachers such as U Tejaniya, U Jotika, Thich Nat Hanh, or Mingyur Rinpoche can play such a crucial role in emphasizing that core issue of one's fundamental attitude towards oneself. 

Psychotherapy is another path towards self-forgiveness, and internalizing the good mother image. This is the road I took before I discovered meditation. Actually, the same can be accomplished through a personal relationship with a meditation teacher as long as he or she is sufficiently grounded in the feminine principle.  

Can you forgive yourself? How tolerant are you of your imperfections? Do you basically love yourself

Pain Beyond Words

U Jotika's Freeing Perspective on Pain.

I continue to draw much inspiration from U Jotika's teachings. This morning, pain found its way inside, as it often does. Heart and body, both hurting. Full of resolve, I sat, determined to not give thinking mind much of a chance. Using breath as an anchor, I let myself sink deep into the flow of sensations, moment to moment. Sure, thoughts did come once in a while, but awareness was watching, and did not let them rule the sitting. There was hardly any reactivity to the pain, and a whole hour went by, without mind getting restless as it usually does. 

Because of our thoughts we experience something more intensely. So when we stop thinking and just become aware of it we don’t really feel anything anymore. What I mean to say is that, things don’t have intensity anymore. Even with pain, say you have pain in your knee when you are sitting and meditating; the more you react the sharper it becomes. When you stop thinking about it and just be in touch with it, without trying to do anything, not trying to overcome it, not interpreting it, just being with the pain, after a while you feel that the pain becomes vague; it is not as painful as before. Our thinking process makes the sensations stronger. When you stop thinking and just get in touch with it, it becomes so vague, that we feel that something is missing. We want to take hold of something. For example, if you have a big round ball, can you hold it with one hand? You cannot. It is a big round slippery ball. But if you put a handle on it you can grab it by the handle. The name, the tag, the interpretation is just like the handle. With the handle we grasp things very strongly, we won’t let it go but, without that handle everything is slippery, you can’t hold to it. When you stop thinking, you get in touch with it, you can’t grasp anything anymore. It becomes slippery and vague, that is the way it should be. 

. . . 

When you experience pain, as long as you can be with the pain to endure it, see how your mind reacts. This is a very important learning process. Buddha gave a very deep and profound teaching, “although my body is in pain my mind is not in pain” (~SN iii.1). This is something you should practice! We cannot really get rid of all the pain in our body. As you grow older and older you know that you have to live with pain. People have arthritis; there is no way you can run away from pain. If you take too much medicine it will destroy your liver, kidneys and many other things. If you want to take medication it is ok; that is not what I am saying. For normal pain it is not going to hurt you very much, so, try to be with the pain and see how the mind reacts. In some cases, we try to move not because the pain is unbearable but because we are restless. We move because we are not in the habit of being in touch with the pain. When you feel pain, without thinking of pain, without even using the word pain, although in the beginning you can use the word pain, but I have noticed that when you use the word pain it becomes more painful, because you are interpreting it as ‘pain’. Pain is something that you don’t like. So automatically you react to the word pain. If you stop using the word pain and just get into the pain, be with the pain, you’ll find that it is very interesting, your mind can stay there for a long time. Some of my friends, who are very scared of pain, don’t want to meditate because they think it will be very painful. Slowly and slowly they have learnt how to meditate and after a while they come in touch with the pain and stay with it, and found out that it becomes very interesting. They get absorbed in the pain. If you are willing to be with the pain, it is not so unbearable; if you are unwilling it becomes more and more unbearable. It is the way that your mind looks at experience. Whenever you feel pain, be with it, it will not kill you, actually. When you find that “this is my limit” and I can’t really go on sitting like this anymore, move very slowly, move a few millimeters and see the pain getting less, the whole experience, and the mind also. When the pain gets a little bit less your mind becomes a little bit relaxed, “Oh… It is nice now… feeling better now”, then move a little bit again; feeling better now. Move again, and then you find another position where you don’t feel pain anymore, you feel happy, you feel very relaxed and then you continue to meditate; sitting for an hour or sometimes even for two hours. 

It takes time for the mind to let go of itself. Today felt like a big breakthrough.  Being able to experience the effect of freedom from mind is like fuel for the practice. Now, I want to sit more, and longer.

I Think Too Much

Our usual thinking mind does not do well with nuances. At least, mine doesn't . . . 'I feel grief.' 'I love this!' 'I have a lot of pain.' So many examples of blanket thoughts that solidify one's experiences and leave no room for the ever changing reality of life. 

We think that there is some sameness all the time, something that is always there. This is the way we create continuity in our mind. Thoughts create continuity and they create this idea of sameness. When we totally stop thinking and become mindful and concentrate and pay attention to whatever is happening right now, we see that something is arising right now. It was not there before. It is right now.

~ U Jotika, 'A Map of the Journey' ~ 

This morning, feeling the heat of anger rising, I stepped outside of habitual thinking mind, right into the inferno.  And discovered with great wonder, a myriad of physical sensations, many of them quite pleasant, that kept coming and going. I did this for a few minutes, for that was all the time I had. The whole experience made me curious though. What else would I have discovered, had I lingered some more?

Life as a stream. Always moving, always changing, alive . . . 

Can Emotions Be Changed?

A Look at the Nature of Emotions, and How to Work with Them From Buddhist Psychology Perspective.

Thanks to one of my Dharma friends from Tathagata Center, I have discovered another Burmese gem. This time, it is U Jotika, an elusive Theravada monk, whose monastery I have not been able to locate yet. I have heard he spends most his time traveling all over Burma and Southeast Asia. U Jotika's balanced approach reminds me of Ajahn Chah. Today, I contemplate his teachings on the whole notion of 'changing emotions':

In some books I read about mental states and consciousness and wisdom and they say that you can change your anger into love; that is impossible! You cannot change your anger into love, into metta, you can’t change dosa (hatred, aversion) into metta; dosa arises and passes away as dosa. Loving kindness (metta) arises as loving kindness and passes away as loving kindness; it cannot change its nature. Its unique, natural characteristic does not change. It only arises and passes away; that is why it is impermanent (anicca). There is a lot of confusion even among meditators about this point; some people think that they can change one thing into another. In a definition of anicca they say that paramattha does not change. There is a Pali sentence that says that paramattha does not change. Some people are confused about the meaning of this. If reality, paramattha does not change it means that it is permanent. No, it doesn’t change its nature, but it arises and passes away. Arising and passing away, impermanence and not changing nature does not contradict. This is a very important point especially for those who are potential teachers.

~ from 'Map of the Journey', by U Jotika ~ 

To be contrasted with Ayya Khema's view on same topic:

Some [feelings] are pleasant, some are unpleasant, some are neutral, but our reactions don't have to be preplanned, impulsive, instinctive. We can look at them with mindfulness and put the brakes on. Substitution is much easier than just dropping what is in the mind. Although dropping is the perfect way to get rid of clinging, it is more difficult because it is a letting-go aspect. In the beginning, substitution is a necessary response . . . When aversion, rejection, resistance, anger, jealousy, pride, greed, or craving arise within, we can take a moment to look at them mindfully. When we recognize their burdensome impact on us, we understand that we need not continue to let them exist. We can substitute compassion, or the idea that they are not important, or the understanding of impermanence, or corelessness. This is particularly true of anger, which makes life so very unpleasant for oneself and others. When we get angry with a person, we can ask ourselves first of all, "What am I getting angry at? Is it the hair, the nose, the eyes, or what? Am I getting angry at his words? If it is really unpleasant speech, it means the other person is unhappy. "Why should I get angry, then? Why can't I be compassionate?" If we can change our anger to compassion, we will feel good, the other person will feel good, and we will have taken a step forward on our spiritual path. 

~ from 'When the Iron Eagle Flies', by Ayya Kkema ~

 And also Mingyur Rinpoche:

If emotion is too overwhelming, 1) go back to other objects of meditation, such as sounds, smells, forms, breath, etc . . . or, 2) make a different emotion, eg, anger instead of panic (gossipy neurons will join anger group instead of panic group)

~ my notes from Rinpoche's recent Joy of Living Retreat ~ 

Three teachers, three different approaches that may seem contradictory on the surface. Upon closer examination, however, the differences may have to do more with semantics.  In the end, it all has to do with the power of the mind to not react, and to insert itself in the midst of powerful emotions. Situations cause feelings that cause thoughts, that cause emotions, that cause feelings, that cause emotions, etc . . . Of course emotions are what they are, and cannot be changed. Their demise can be hasted however, with mindfulness about their effect on us, and the cause and effect relationship between thoughts and emotions. 'Changing' emotions actually involves letting go of defilement, and cultivating instead a wholesome mind state, including wholesome thoughts and emotions. 

This is my take. What do you think?