On my way, driving to IMC this morning, my mind's caught in a whirlwind of thoughts. About this new idea, that has been growing over the last few weeks. Head still spinning, I ready for sitting with the habitual Sunday crowd. At least, I am aware, and prepared to welcome the onslaught inside. The room seems restless, adding to my agitation. Doors opening and closing, neighbor whispering to newcomer, pots falling in the kitchen, the usual coughs and clearings of throat. 'Brilliant' thought about idea, breath, noise, another exciting thought, noise, yet another thought, noise, breath . . . and so it goes, until the room, and then I, calm down enough, for breath to take center stage. Energy moving down from head to heart. Body sinking into the floor, and chair. Thinking receding. Image of still lake, and impurities settling down at the bottom. Just as I was becoming one with breath, the bell rings.
Appropriately, Gil's talk today was about 'Love', and Liberation. And the need to clear one self from thinking, to get to place where heart is open for love. I loved Gil's story of going to the symphony, and missing the first half of the concert, because he was too absorbed into his thoughts about the various musicians. How he had to close his eyes, to clear his thoughts, and go to place of relative stillness, to finally hear the music.
One of the big shifts in my still young practice, has been a growing appreciation for the gift of tranquillity, that comes from sitting long enough, so that the mind gets a chance to settle. No effort, other than pure awareness and still body, and patience also, to allow for thinking to exhaust itself. All in an attitude of surrender, and trust in the process. Today, I got six uninterrupted breaths, or about one minute worth of just being. Nice . . .
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