Anxious. I felt the frazzling vibes of the big A, all day. Loved one was leaving, and my heart was protesting. Back from the airport, I headed to my chair, set the timer, and readied for 45' of quiet. Sittings have become a wonderful refuge, a place in time when I can be present to myself.
Heart calling at once. Love's filling me. The big A's receding. Tears, rolling down, so soft, I don't even notice them at first. Image of loved one, and warm thoughts her way. That she be happy, and safe, and well, and at peace. Breath in, and out, in, and out . . . Hardly any thoughts. Sleepiness taking over, slowly. Mind won't let it. Not time for a nap, at least not yet. Using breath to stay awake and aware. Anxiety sapped my energy, and now my body's demanding some rest.
On Sunday, Gil described anxiety as a wasteful state, to be dispensed of. I agree with him. The big A's insidious, and tends to creep in, particularly during emotional charged moments. If I still had any doubts, today's sitting proved the importance of giving the agitated mind time to settle. A few minutes, is all it took.
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