I tell Gil about the fear, that I felt this morning, while sitting. Big fear, causes unknown, more intense with the passage up and down of each breath. We talk about my relationship to it. How I have these opinions about fear, as something not good, to be rid of. That's how I feel deeply . . .
Gil's answer: "Be a scared Buddha."
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I remember a time in my life of emotional turmoil... I went through waves of grief, anger, confusion, fear... and somewhere in the middle of all that I "got" that there was no problem. That these were all just waves, neither bad nor good, and I could just surf them. That was such a liberating experience.
ReplyDeleteThank you for sharing so honestly...
As Genpo Roshi says, if you feel something or think something, don't try to get rid of it, BE it fully.
ReplyDeleteYes, you are both so right. At the same time, between understanding and realization, can be years . . . To face and accept that place of non acceptance is where I had to go today. Having teacher give me 'permission' to be scared Buddha was very powerful.
ReplyDeleteThat's so powerful. Thanks for sharing.
ReplyDeleteI've always been caught up trying to be stronger, harder, tougher rather than rest in just being. Being scared is all part of the experience.
Thank you. Yes, indeed, very powerful. I am finding I have to walk fine line when reading Buddhist texts. The head can get all twisted around portrayal of samsara states such as as anger and fear . . .
ReplyDeleteLove that, "rest in just being" . . . with breath as our steady friend :)
deep bow,
marguerite
Thank you for this teaching, it resonates with me deeply. I especially appreciate you passing on Gil's wise words. I live in Canada and have listened to his talks for years via audiodharma; you are so blessed to be near him.
ReplyDeleteOh! Tara, I am so glad this resonates with you. Do you have a sangha near where you live? a teacher, close to you?
ReplyDeleteI wish you best in your continued practice.
deep bow,
marguerite
You are indeed the Sacred Buddha. There really is no way that it could be otherwise.
ReplyDelete~Seiho
We all are, minus interferences . . . :)
ReplyDelete